Building relationships and knowing your students

I know that I have many teacher friends who follow both facebook and my blog, so I thought I would share this message that I just sent out to my campus. It was prompted by the tragic killing of one of my students over the weekend.

Building relationships and knowing your students

This weekend had been full of reflection for me as I work though the sadness and frustration of losing one of our 6th grade students. After hearing about the sad news I sent a text message to my mom telling her what happened and sent another text to a teacher asking if she had read the email from Kevin. Within 30 seconds of each other my mom asked me if I knew the student well and the teacher asked me if he had brothers or sisters. It was at the moment that I could hear Kevin’s voice telling us how important it is to build relationships with our students, something that I thought I had done well with until now.

After letting the news process for a bit I went out on the longest mountain bike ride I have ever been on and purposefully lagged behind the group I was with so that I could use my time on the trail to reflect. In my head I went through every class and every student to see if there was something unique that I could identify about each of them. Every class had those two or three students who were quiet, did their work and did everything they were asked to do. Deonte was one of those students. A student that I thought I knew, but apparently not well enough.

And once again I heard that voice telling me how important it was to build relationships with and know my students. Every single student. Not just the ones who are respectful and do their work or get upset because they lost two points on a quiz. We all have those students who make us cringe as they walk towards our room. The ones that we just wish would transfer or get sent to DAEP. When really those are probably the ones we probably should be building the strongest relationships with. Even last week I was guilty of celebrating the fact that a student had just transferred to another school, when in reality that student just needed love from his teachers because he clearly did not get it at home. Even the high school students that caused this tragedy probably just needed love and needed the security that someone cared about them.

So, towards the end of my long trail ride I decided to challenge myself. I know that there are only 40 days of school left. But there is a lot I can learn about my students and a lot of relationships that I can build in those 40 days. I would like to share that challenge with all my West Family. That way if one of our precious babies becomes an angel and someone asks if you knew them well or if they have brothers or sisters you can answer the question. And answer it knowing that you had done all you could do to build a strong student teacher relationship with that student.

Treasures

Yesterday one of our teachers got a phone call from her mothers work stating that her mom never showed up for work. This teacher went to her mother's house and later on we all found out that God had decided it was time to take her away peacefully.
When finding out this news, some of us just stood there in shock...most of us probably doing the same thing I was, reflecting and being thankful that we still have our loved ones in our lives, and others were reflecting on the fact that they had recently lost a loved one.
I am a believer, and have faith that when it is time for my parents, friends, or other family members to go, that I will meet them again when the time is right. BUT, no matter what I can not come to terms with the idea of death. I can not imagine the world with out my favorite people, or myself for that matter. Some have told me that I feel this way because I have been fortunate to have experiences very few deaths in my life time. This may be true, but either way, I am not sure death is ever going to be something I come to peace with.
In the meantime, I need to count my blessings and be happy with the treasures that I have here on earth now. :-)

Blessed

This weekend was a reminder of how blessed I am to have found the friends that I have in my life.
Every Friday night Aaron and I rush home to pack up all our cycling gear and head out to River Legacy Park for the weekly Friday Night Ride. This is something that I look forward to every week because I know that I get to ride off all the stress from the work week and I get to hang out with people that in general just love life. I know that not everyone in this group has a perfect life b/c we all have our own issues we have to live through. But when we all get together we ride, have fun and can make each other laugh.
This past Friday Night Ride was eventful for me...Aaron and I arrived early and rode a slow lap. As we were finishing we saw the rest of the group coming onto the trail, Aaron did not have his riding light so he did not do another lap. But I was hoping to get another lap in, so I went ahead and rode with the group. At one point I got ahead of everyone because there are parts of the trail I do not ride. All of a sudden four of the guys got behind me and would not let me pull over to let them pass me. They had me riding 12 mph! I have never rode the mountain bike that fast! At one point I thought I was going to puke, but I just kept pushing myself and finally made it to the end. Not sure I could ride the who trail that fast, but those guys pushed me and cheered me on to the end. They cared enough to help me become a better rider :-)
Saturday was a busy day for us as well, but it was spent with good friends as well. Our friends Rick and Lori had their plans fall through, so they came and spent the day with us helping us pick out some camping gear. While at dinner with them I was reminded of what good people Rick and Lori are. Ever since I started riding they have been a part of my life. They were there for me when I broke my leg, helped me get moved into Aaron's moms house when I was released from the hospital. And that is only the beginning!
Then tonight we had our five year anniversary party for the National Mountain Bike Patrol, a group the Rick started. And once again I was surrounded by some of my favorite people! We had a good time eating cake (some decided to play with frosting!) and kicking some major butt in laser tag! Bike Patrol always wins!!
Aaron and I have talked about moving to Austin in a few years...but this weekend has made me question that again. Do I really want to leave this family of friends that we have been so blessed to have in our lives????

Driving Mrs. Daisy

For almost three weeks now Aaron and I have been carpooling to work. This helps us save on gas and is preparing us for what it will be like to have one car. Aaron's brother is going to be buying our Element soon. This was something we had talked about a while back because his niece loves my car and she will be 16 in October. We originally were not going to sell the Element until then, but Aaron's brother totaled his mustang...he is ok! We are not ready to purchase a new vehicle for me at this time, so we just decided we would take this opportunity to save money and gas.

I love having this extra time with my husband every morning and afternoon. It gives us more time to talk with out the distraction of tv or computers. However, I miss being able to call my mom every morning. For the past six years, I have been calling my mom in the morning while on my way to work. It has become a routine for us that I look forward to every day. This year she got a job that prevents her from talking in the morning, but after a few weeks she changed her schedule and all was well. But then I started riding to work with Aaron, and now I do not have those private moments with my mom. So, I have decided that I will call her when I am doing my makeup every morning! Aaron is usually in the shower and so this gives me a few moments with my mom every day. It would probably be different if she did not live so far away...and if she read this she would remind me that it was my choice to live 700 miles away from her. I know it was my choice, but I can still miss her!

So, in the mean time, Aaron and I will continue to ride together every morning and afternoon. Which is fine with me because I hate driving anyway!

its been a long year

I have come to the realization that daily, weekly, or even monthly blogging may not be for me! Especially since it has been a year since my last post...

A few things have happened lately that have forced me to sit back and re-evaluate my life. I started grad school in September and that is something that has most certainly taught me time management! It is a lot of homework and writing, but in the end it will all be worth it...hopefully! I have given up a few things at school, such as being a cheer coach, to give myself more time to focus on my school and family.

Last May Aaron and I decided that we would try to start a family. This has turned into an experience that I never thought I would have to go through. Over the past year and a half I have I watched a few of my dearest friends be blessed with the most beautiful babies and I could not be happier for them. I treasure the times when I am allowed to hold and love on these precious miracles. But I have these thoughts in the back of my mind wondering when I am going to be blessed with this same miracle; I know that I can not live through my friends forever.

Aaron and I have been going to doctors since the beginning of June trying to get my stubborn body to work right. Imagine going to the doctor several times a month only for them to tell you that everything you have tried, all the drugs you are putting into your body, are not working. I listen to the stories my friends tell about being pregnant and I want to be able to share those same type of stories.

I hear stories of people who have had abortions, or who really dont want to have a baby, and they are walking around pregnant right now. Or I hear another story about a woman who is drinking and smoking while pregnant. Or even the women who just leave their baby in a trash can somewhere. I can not help but wonder why those people are allowed to experience the miracle of being pregnant and giving birth. Why them and not me, someone who really wants to live through the experience and give a child a loving home.

But, this is when I have to sit back and remember that this is not all up to me. I have to let go remind myself that I am not in charge of this part of my life. That there is some reason, unknown to me right now, as to why I am not pregnant yet. We know that everything works, my ovaries are just stubborn and apparently have a plan as to when they are going to let some of their little eggs go!

In the meantime, I have to be thankful for my friends who allow me to love on their babies as much as I want and provide as much support as they can. I also have to remember that I have been blessed with the most supportive and loving husband that a woman could ask for.

Career Changes

Ever since I met Aaron has has talked about how the idea of going into real estate appeals to him. Well, a few weeks ago he finally made the decision to jump into the process of getting his real estate license and will soon be on his way to selling and listing homes.
I am very excited for this new endeavor, but also a bit worried. We are not in a position for Aaron to completely quit his current job so he will have to carry both jobs for a few months. My last post about time management would fit in quite well here! We are going to be balancing our personal lives along with both of his jobs for a while. I am sure this will not be easy, but hopefully it is rewarding in the long run. We both have goals for ourselves and our future family and in order to reach those goals we will have to make it through the next few months together peacefully!
Changing careers is not easy for anyone at any age. When I decided almost four years ago to go into teaching I was scared! I didn't know what was on the path ahead of me, and even sometimes I still don't. Aaron however, is going into a field that is never as consistent as teaching! There is no doubt in my mind that he will be successful and that he is going to put all he has into this career jump.
So, if you or anyone you know across this country is looking for a house, or selling a house please let us know! It would help Aaron get a head start on this new endeavor! He can help anyone across the country, so hesitate to contact us :-)

time management

Now that I am married I have become more aware of how I spend my time. During my first two years of teaching I was not so concerned with getting home right after school. Dont get me wrong, I loved coming home to Aaron. But there is something different about knowing I am going to home to my husband. Knowing that most of the time he is there waiting for me to come home.

The downside to all this is that I have become so involved at school that I do not get home until much later than I used to. I love what I do at school and do not want to give anything up, but everyday I have to keep in mind that I can not stay and socialize after cheer practice or games. I need to get home to my husband!

As humans we must treasure every moment we have with our loved ones. No one has discovered this infamous fountain of youth yet, so we do not have forever to spend with our family. Almost everyday I am reminded of this and I tell myself that I need to call my mom and talk to her, or that I need to send Aaron a quick email reminding him how much I love him. We may get in arguments with someone we love, and we may not always be happy with the way that person is acting; but we still have to treasure the amount of time we have to share our love.